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Jumper
Movie Stats & Links |
| Starring: |
Hayden
Christensen, Samuel L. Jackson, Diane Lane, Jamie Bell,
Rachel Bilson |
| MPAA Rated: |
PG-13 |
| Released By: |
20th Century Fox |
| Web Site: |
www.jumperthemovie.com |
| Kiddie Movie: |
Probably won't be
fun for them seeing a dude get gutted. |
| Date Movie: |
Only if she's you
high school girlfriend. |
| Gratuitous Sex: |
David and Millie
get it on, but only down to a bra. |
| Gratuitous
Violence: |
See "Kiddie
Movie." |
| Action: |
Lots of "jumper"
chasing. |
| Laughs: |
Nah. |
| Memorable
Scene: |
Nope. |
| Memorable
Quote: |
Nope. |
| Directed By: |
Doug Liman |
| Produced By: |
Lucas Foster,
Simon Kinberg, Arnon Milchan, Jay
Sanders |
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Jumper
A Movie Review |
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So you’ve got this really cool ability – you can teleport
just about anywhere in the world just by thinking about it.
How do you use it? You break into banks to steal money then
spend your days in exotic locations surfing, eating on top
of The Sphinx, then pick up women, sleep with them, and
teleport back to your swanky pad in New York City. Sure, you
could use your ability for good, like rescuing people in a
flood, but why bother with being a superhero? Add in a hot
dudette you like and some religious wack-jobs hell-bent on
killing you, and you pretty much get the movie "Jumper."
Here’s who are involved and what they do…
Hayden Christensen, you might remember him as Anakin
Skywalker in "Star Wars" II & III, well, he plays David, and
he’s a dork in high school with an abusive dad and a mom who
ran off when he was five years old. He falls through some
ice, then finds himself in the local library, and now it’s
time to rob banks and live the good life. But something is
missing from his life, namely the woman he loves, and that
woman is Millie (Rachel Bilson). I guess it’s hard to find
true love when you don’t use a door. Other than the woman
situation, David’s life is good up until he runs into Roland
(Samuel L. Jackson), who wants him dead. It seems he doesn’t
like "jumpers" very much, but David is able to get away,
finds Millie again, actually takes a plane to whisk her to
Rome, where of course they find love while David also finds
Griffin (Jamie Bell), a fellow jumper who helps David from
not being dead. David now finds out that Roland is the
leader of the Paladins, a group of religious nuts whose sole
purpose in life is to seek out and kill "jumpers," usually
using a way bad-ass taser to subdue said jumper, and then
gut them, while Griffin is hell-bent on killing the Paladin.
And so David finds himself caught in the middle of this
hidden, religious war, only really wanting to get it on with
Millie and maybe catch some London rain. Sure, things aren’t
that simple because Roland knows the way to kill David is to
use Millie, leading up to the climactic fight with Roland
where all David wants to do is prove to Roland that he isn’t
really a bad guy, with no help from Griffin who doesn’t want
any part in forming a Superhero team.
For me "Jumper" had a lot of potential, although I’m not
really sure where that was, because in the end the movie was
pretty much about a group of religious fanatics who wanted
to kill the "jumpers" because they felt only God should have
that kind of power. I would have rather had a movie where
David realizes he can do good, almost like Superman, paid
back the banks like he said he would, and then maybe worked
with Roland to find rogue "jumpers," those that were using
their powers for bad. The reason I say that is because it
almost seemed to hint that "Jumper" could have been a
superhero movie, instead it ended up just being a dork who
has a really cool ability and likes the hot girl.
And, oh yea, he has a mom, Mary, played by Diane Lane,
who may or may not be good.
I wanted so much more in this movie but didn’t get it,
and for me it’s 1 1/2 stars out of 5 for "Jumper." It might be
an okay rental later, if you are 17, but if you’re older
you’ll probably just find it stupid.
That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!!
L8R!!! |
