Andy Labis, Author at Entertainment Ave!

No Orff, Yummy XOCO, Goodbye Chuck, Happy Birthday, and Bad Movies

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(Dude note: Computer woes can’t stop a podcast, but they can delay it getting posted for a day or so. All seems well again on the Entertainment Ave! front, but a belated Happy Birthday to Mama Gotz is in order!)

Orff’s “Carmina Burana” came through Chicago again, and again I missed it, but that doesn’t dampen the mood of this “Weekend Wrap-Up!” podcast episode. Nope, it’s a podcast of a Happy Birthday for Mama Gotz complete with good food and good friends; It’s a podcast of Mexican street fare compliments, well not really compliments of because we had to pay for it, but damn, XOCO was a good little restaurant place; And it’s a podcast of liking how the TV show “Chuck” wrapped up.

Google is changing their privacy policy, Stu watched some of “Little Fockers,” I watched some of “2012,” Stu doesn’t know who is playing in the Super Bowl, and I don’t think either of us will be seeing a movie about whales.

Thanks for listening!

That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

No One is Sleeping With the Fishes, Neil Diamond is A Good Time, Blockbuster is Moving, Moneyball is Great, and a Pine Wood Derby Wind Tunnel!

By: The Dude on the Right

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What better way to start a podcast after surviving a winter storm than with some old Neil Diamond, and at the start of this week’s episode of the “Weekend Wrap-Up!”, there is confusion as to whether or not I hit the post. Whether I did or not, that’s okay, because in addition to our confusion and recollection of some Neil concert memories, of a more confusing nature, it turns out, is what date is the actual anniversary of Stu and Mama Gotz, and on this we don’t come to a resolution.

We did, though, as I mentioned, survive a winter storm, and Stu luckily didn’t have to worry about sleeping with the fishes, instead there was a problem with Frosty in this video shot by Little Gotz. We also discovered that Blockbuster is moving, and that I still suck at the new words in church.

Stu saw “Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol” and liked it, I let you know if “Moneyball” is any good, Stu can’t recommend “The Darkest Hour” even though I thought he meant “The Devil Inside,” and yes, it’s true, a 2mm screw will not fit inside a 1mm nut.

Lastly, it’s Pine Wood Derby time and Stu has his method for his kids achieving greatness, though I feel a wind tunnel might be more appropriate.

Thanks for listening!

That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

A Debate Translator App, Sherlock Holmes, No Tattoos ,Chicken Pot Pie, Oprah Winfrey, and Howard Stern.

By: The Dude on the Right

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With the weather so fabulous in Chicago right now you would think Stu Gotz or I would have gone crazy and gotten stuff done, but, instead, as you’ll find out during this episode of our “Weekend Wrap-Up!” podcast, it was really a weekend to relax, rest, and finally get ready for 2012.

Stu, at least, did get out with Mama Gotz, and rather than see “The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo” they opted for “Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows”he lets us know if we should go and see it as well. Me, I was going to see “War Horse,” but it was decided a nap was more important and upon further review, even if “War Horse” ends up winning an Academy Award, the nap was the right choice.

Stu didn’t go SCUBA diving, we both liked Charles Barkley on “Saturday Night Live,” I think there should be a Charles Barkley translator app to explain what the Republican candidates are really saying during the debates, Beezow Doo-Doo Zopittybop-Bop-Bop was arrested, Stu thinks he might want to see “Beauty and The Beast” in 3-D, while I might be seeing “The Iron Lady” if it opens anywhere near me, and I think Oprah Winfrey and Howard Stern should interview each other. Hopefully we will be more exciting next weekend!

Thanks for listening!

That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Dumb and Dumberer: When Harry Met Lloyd

MPAA Rated – PG-13
It’s 1:25 Long
A Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

Dumb and Dumberer: When Harry Met Lloyd Movie Stats & Links
Starring:	Eric Christian Olsen, Derek Richardson, Eugene Levy, Cheri Oteri, Rachel Nichols
MPAA Rated:	PG-13
Released By:	New Line Cinema
Release Date:	2003
Kiddie Movie:	Nope.
Date Movie:	Nope.
Gratuitous Sex:	Two dudettes kissing and it appeared a little cold on the set sometimes.
Gratuitous Violence:	Slapstick.
Action:	Nah.
Laughs:	Not really.
Memorable Scene:	I don’t remember it.
Memorable Quote:	None.
Directed By:	Troy Miller

Okay, other than the movie being pretty much, well, for no better way to put it, dumb, there’s another significant problem with “Dumb and Dumberer: When Harry Met Lloyd,” at least for me – the jokes seem to be aimed at 10 year old boys, but the story is something better comprehended by 16 year olds. I know that may not make sense, but pretty much it’s more of a high school comedy with jokes 10 year olds aren’t really old enough to experience yet.

“D & Derer” has Erick Christian Olsen as Lloyd, the character Jim Carrey made famous. It’s also got Derek Richardson as Harry, the loveable character originally portrayed by Jeff Daniels. In the film we are exposed to how the two characters we fell in love with in “Dumb & Dumber” first met, their high school year, and a bizarre sub-plot of the principal (the usually better Eugene Levy) and the lunchlady (Cheri Oteri) trying to embezzle money for a condo in Hawaii. Sort of like the first movie, our boys innocently get wrapped up in the lives of the bad people and there’s a high school hottie, Jessica (Rachel Nichols), who both boys fall in love with, trying to expose the principal, but unlike the first movie, it just isn’t funny.

There are the obligatory fart jokes, you get a creepy Lloyd thinking Harry’s mom is in love with him, even fantasizing her (Mimi Rogers) and Jessica having a make-out session in a pool, and what are supposedly super-funny things like drinking a slushy to fast and getting brain freeze, as well as making fun of an Asian student. Well, alright, the Asian student thing was kinda funny, especially when, all of the sudden, she starts speaking perfect English, but one Asian joke doesn’t fill an hour and a half.

I think one of the main problems “D & Derer” has is the fact the boys are in high school. It’s easier to laugh at grown men acting like innocent teenagers than to find seniors in high school with the wits of, well, most ten year olds have more wit than these guys. There is that, and there’s also the fact there is no way this movie could have come close to living up to the standard set by the original.

Even for those easily amused, of which I am proud to one of them, I wasn’t. Not that there wasn’t a funny line or two, or a scene where I did bust out laughing, but I can’t remember what that scene was nor what that lines were because, for the most part, you get lines like: Harry – “Who’s Principal Collins?” Lloyd – “He’s the Principal.”; and Lloyd – “Chicks are for fags.”; and scenes where the boys are drooling or have food all over their faces. Even the smeared melted chocolate bar in the bathroom wasn’t that funny. However, if you think those lines and those scenes might be hilarious, you might really like “Dumb & Dumberer: When Harry Met Lloyd.” Me, I didn’t, and it’s ½ star out of 5 for this movie. Wait for it on local TV and then watch something else.

That’s it for this review! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Dreamer: Inspired by a True Story

MPAA Rated – PG
It’s 1:45 Long
A Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

Dreamer: Inspired by a True Story Movie Stats & Links
Starring:	Kurt Russell, Dakota Fanning, Kris Kristofferson, Elisabeth Shue
MPAA Rated:	PG
Released By:	Dreamworks SKG
Release Date:	2005
Kiddie Movie:	More for the girls, but good for all.
Date Movie:	If she likes a feel-good movie.
Gratuitous Sex:	Nope.
Gratuitous Violence:	Some angry talk, but no one’s punching each other out.
Action:	Just some horse-racing.
Laughs:	Some pretty good moments.
Memorable Scene:	Cale in front of the Breeders’ Cup horse-choosing people.
Memorable Quote:	Ben: “You work for her now.”
Directed By:	John Gatins

As much as Dakota Fanning has been impressing me in movie after movie she is in, I am becoming a big fan of Snake Plissken, I mean Kurt Russell, especially with his role as Herb Brooks in “Miracle,” and now as Ben Crane in “Dreamer: Inspired by a True Story.” Let’s get to it…

“Dreamer: Inspired by a True Story” gives us an adaptation of a story where a son and dad nurse a horse back from a broken leg and get it to race in the Breeders’ Cup. From what I’ve read, and what the movie showed, that’s pretty much the only part of the story that was inspired, but that’s okay, because instead of just a movie about getting a horse back to racing shape, we get a movie about a family in disarray and how the horse gets the family to be a family again.

So, Dakota Fanning is Cale. She’s a fan of her dad, Ben, but Ben doesn’t spend any time with her, and she’s sort of tormented because they live on a horse farm without any horses. Finally going to work with Dad, she gets to see a horse, Sonya, run, and Cale likes her. She also gets to see that Dad’s boss, Palmer (David Morse), is a jerk. Sadly, during Sonya’s race, Sonya breaks a leg, and they are ready to put the horse down. Palmer again treats Ben like crap, Ben gets fired/quits, and in lieu of some of his back pay, Ben take Sonya instead.

Now taking Sonya may seem like a stupid idea to the rest of us, who normally assume a racehorse with a broken leg might as well just be put to sleep, but Ben does have a plan, and it’s a good plan, but with a bad ending.

Later in the movie, after Ben has an argument with Mom (Elisabeth Shue), overheard by Cale, Cale decides to take Sonya (whose actual name is Soñador, which means dreamer in Spanish) and run away from home, Sonya gets spooked, and everyone involved realizes Sonya might actually be able to race again, which is a good thing since she can’t get pregnant.

And so, Ben eventually gives Cale total say in how Sonya is worked, and she has some help from a couple of other horse-folk, Balon (Luis Guzman), and Manolin (Freddy Rodriquez). Sonya now only has one dream left, and that’s to get Sonya into the Breeders’ Cup, and mom makes dad let their daughter follow her dream, and it’s a good thing mom is around.

There really aren’t any surprises in this movie, but you know what, I didn’t care because it was just an enjoyable film. You feel for Cale when dad makes a mistake at Sonya’s come-back race, you understand the frustration for Ben when his original plan for Sonya falls apart, you’re happy that Palmer gets payback for being a jerk, and you feel the tension between Ben and his father, Pop (Kris Kristofferson), knowing they have a past that they just can’t get over. For all of this to work, you needed a cast of folks who could pull this off, and everyone involved in this movie was perfectly cast.

I don’t know if younger boys (most definitely not teen boys) would like the movie, especially with so much of it being centered around Cale, but most of the families that were in the theater really seemed to enjoy it. If you’ve got a young daughter, this movie is probably perfect for her, just realize that she might come out of the film wanting you to buy her a horse instead of a puppy. 4 ½ stars out of 5, you know what, screw that, it’s 5 stars out of 5, even without nudity, gratuitous violence, or swearing. And yes, I admit, it made me a little weepy at times.

That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

The Bachelor Women are Back, There’s a Tardis-Shaped Mug, Rubber Tires Attack, and Abraham Lincoln is a Vampire Hunter

By: The Dude on the Right

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It’s a New Year, Stu Gotz is back, and the crazy women on The Bachelor have returned – So far 2012 is proving to be a fabulous year, and during this podcast episode of our “Weekend Wrap-Up!” podcast we wrap up our 2011’s and look forward to the 12’s.

Yup, as 2011 wrapped up, Stu and I saw a bunch of movies, so Stu summarizes “Hugo” and “The Adventures of Tintin,” both in 3-D, while I let Stu know if he should see “Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol” or “The Descendants.” Stu doesn’t really tell me if I should seek out a movie called “Rubber,” explains he didn’t like “The Adjustment Bureau” nor “The Green Lantern,” and I couldn’t tell if he was really looking forward to “Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter” but it really is a movie supposedly coming out in 2012. As for me, I give Stu the skinny on “Rise of the Planet of the Apes,” try to egg him on to watch “The Bachelor,” but tell him that in a worst case, if it’s back on next New Year’s Eve at the end of 2012, some of the best television watching is the ABC 7 Chicago, New Year’s Eve Countdown with Janet Davies and Mark Giangreco for reasons I still can’t totally put into words.

We both got things we wanted for Christmas (Who knew they make a Dr. Who Tardis Mug that’s square?), neither of us seem to have any resolutions for the new year, and it will be nice to get back to normal after the Holiday season. We start with a podcast.

Thanks for listening!

That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo

MPAA Rated – R
It’s 1:17 Long
A Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo Movie Stats & Links
Starring:	Rob Schneider, Eddie Griffin
MPAA Rated:	R
Released By:	Columbia Pictures
Release Date:	2005
Kiddie Movie:	Definitely not.
Date Movie:	Depends on if your date is an inhabitant of Easily Amused.
Gratuitous Sex:	Mostly nudity and talk.
Gratuitous Violence:	People get thrown through windows.
Action:	Not really.
Laughs:	If you are an inhabitant of Easily Amused.
Memorable Scene:	The scene where Deuce’s “stop whales from beaching” device goes haywire.
Memorable Quote:	Too many.
Directed By:	Mike Bigelow

I can fully understand critics giving this movie zero stars, ½ star, or maybe 1 star. I really can. I understand this, because, yes, the movie is everything these critics have been writing or saying about it. But “Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo” is the kind of movie made not having a critic’s opinion in mind, but rather appealing to the folks of the country of Easily Amused, of which I am proclaiming myself King, because, yes, as dumb as the movie pretty much was, I couldn’t help but laugh at each of the new words and phrases that were invented to replace the word “penis.” And who can’t appreciate a pimp-boat.

Deuce Bigalow’s (Rob Schneider) last couple of years haven’t been going well. First he loses his wife with one leg to a turtle feeding mishap where the lettuce was tainted with meat, inviting the sharks to come along, that once they spit out the lettuce decided Kate would make a better meal. Then his development of a device to stop whales from beaching kinda goes haywire. Now Bruce is a wanted man and thank goodness for Bruce that his old buddy T.J. (Eddie Griffin) is having some issues in Amsterdam and invites Bruce to pay him a visit.

It seems that gigolos are having a bit of a problem in Amsterdam, namely they are being killed off, and T.J. is worried as business starts to dry up. When T.J. is framed for one of the murders, it’s now up to Deuce to go under-cover, meeting up, again, with a variety of freaky women (one has a penis for a nose, watch out for her sneeze, another who has more of a blow-hole rather than a tracheotomy, watch out for hiccups, and another has giant ears, so of course there is no better way to get a man to stop checking out her ears if she were to get a boob job), and once again, rather than just being the man-whore that he is, he makes the women feel better about themselves. As Deuce’s investigation gets deeper and deeper, of course there is also a love interest that develops for Deuce, and yes, in the end, Deuce saves the gigolos from being blown up, and all is back to normal in the man-whore world.

Like I said, as King of Easily Amused, I knew what to expect going into this film, and got exactly that, and a little bit more thanks to the likes of Norm Macdonald as a crotchety old man-whore. There is also an extension of the vocabulary for the word “penis,” and I’m sure I missed some, but we find “Lock Ness Monster,” “schlong,” “man-gina,” “he-pussy,” “magic shenis,” “snatch pole,” and “she cock” to name a few. We are also introduced to some new terminology for kinky sex acts, expanding on the “Dirty Sanchez” to give us things like the “Filthy Ramirez,” “Cambodian Creamsicle,” “Turkish Sno-Cone,” “Chili Rainbow,” and the scarily portrayed “Portuguese Breakfast.”

Look, the boys are in Amsterdam, so you definitely get some drug use, some nudity, and some kinky sex. You also get exactly what you will expect from this movie, so for those critics who gave it zero stars, like I said, I understand your stance, but for me, it’s 3 ½ stars out of 5 for being exactly what it was made out to be: humor for us in the land of Easily Amused. Stupid. Yea, so what, but I still enjoyed it and that’s why I’m King.

That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo

MPAA Rated – R
It’s 1:28 Long
A Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo Movie Stats & Links
Starring:	Rob Schneider, Arija Bareikis
MPAA Rated:	R
Released By:	Touchstone Pictures
Release Date:	1999
Kiddie Movie:	Lots of bad language and adult jokes. Too young and they’ll ask too many questions.
Date Movie:	It’s more a dude movie, but she might like it if she has a warped sense of humor.
Gratuitous Sex:	Nothing gratuitous.
Gratuitous Violence:	Some things breaking.
Action:	Nah.
Laughs:	It’s better on video.
Memorable Scene:	None.
Memorable Quote:	None.
Directed By:	Sid Ganis, Barry Bernardi

I really didn’t like “Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo” when it was in the theaters. Maybe I was just in a bad mood, but I didn’t find it funny, wondered why it was made, and just didn’t like it. Back then I gave it 1 star. But then I got the DVD and decided that this movie really isn’t that bad.

Rob Schneider plays Deuce Bigalow. He’s a fish tank cleaner who gets most of his enjoyment by making the girl in the fish store dip her breasts in the snail tank so he can see her boobs. He gives his fish bottled water and drinks rusty pipe water, and he ends up taking care of a cool, gigolo’s fish while the gigolo is out of the country. He accidentally trashes the place and needs to come up with a ton of cash or face the wrath of Antoine, the cool gigolo, and with the help of T.J., a man pimp, becomes a gigolo, or rather, a man whore, himself. But Deuce doesn’t score the hot chicks, nope, T.J. sets Deuce up with the “freaks” where Deuce charms the ladies with good verbal skills rather than being good in the sack.

Alright, to be a little more fair the movie does go deeper than that, sort of preaching the message that everyone is special in their own way, and maybe because I was in a better mood, maybe being a little bit older, or maybe being at home where I don’t try to engross myself in a movie most of the time, but this time I enjoyed “Deuce Bigalow..”. The scenes that gave me chuckles in the theater gave me chuckles again, like the narcoleptic girl who tied her hair to the light so she wouldn’t drown in her soup when she fell asleep, but also felt a little sorry for Deuce, especially as his relationship with Kate fell apart.

It’s an adult rental but remember to bring out the child in you when you watch it. If you do as I say it’s 3 stars out of 5. If you’re looking for an intelligent comedy, “Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo” isn’t it, but if your looking for stupid fun, go ahead and rent it!

That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Winning Survivor, Ankle OCD, Christmas Movies are Coming, and The Chicago Bears Still Suck.

By: The Dude on the Right

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I hope Stu Gotz is okay because he couldn’t make the podcast, and the last thing he requested was that I have police car and jail door slamming sound effects for the podcast. I’m a little worried, but I soldier on with this “Weekend Wrap-Up!” podcast episode without him, because I’m sure that is what he would have wanted me to do, especially if he were tied up!

As weekends go, mine was pretty uneventful as I’m kind of hung up with a walking boot, per doctor’s orders, following my MRI last week. During this podcast I detail my injuries, but not so much how I think I ended up with them, I think that might be a tale for another podcast. Having the walking boot isn’t that much of a pain, but mostly bugs me because I can’t help my BFF clean in preparation for our in-laws first visit this Christmastime. I did get to watch “Rise of The Planet of the Apes” and really liked it, so I deconstruct the movie for you, and I also deconstruct “Survivor,” and how Sophie won mostly because she was the person everyone hated the least. It was one of the most interesting tribal councils ever, and I’m always along for the “Survivor” ride.

The Chicago Bears still suck, there are a ton of movies coming out in the next week, “Sherlock Holmes” and “The Chipmunks” didn’t do that well at the box office even if their numbers were in the multi-millions, the days start getting longer in a few days, I still need to do Christmas shopping, and oh yea, the Bears still suck.

Thanks for listening!

That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Fraternity Brothers and Cub Scouts, Hooters and The Cheesecake Factor, Austin Powers and American Pie, Pillars and Ellen’s 12 Days of Giveaways.

By: The Dude on the Right

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I survived a weekend with Theta Xi Fraternity brothers, and Stu Gotz survived a Cub Scout Christmas Party, and during this podcast episode of our “Weekend Wrap-Up!” we explain how both events weren’t nearly as crazy as you might think.

Yup, being early December, it was time for a reunion of sorts for me, with lifelong friends from college, and as times have changed, Hooters has been replaced by The Cheesecake Factory and an afternoon in a dimly-lit bar has been replaced by The Lego Store. Stu, meanwhile, kept getting conflicting instructions as to the location of a Cub Scout Christmas Party, but luckily he found it behind door number 41, and as weekends go, Stu is liking “Pillars” on the Reelz Channel, and still is liking “Cowboys & Aliens” now out on Blu-ray and me, well, a busy weekend leads to needing to catch up on my TV viewing, although I am caught up through Day 7 of Ellen’s 12 Days of Giveaways, thinking so far Day 1 was the best day to have been in the audience.

Stu still likes Austin Powers, I’m trying to schedule an “American Pie” marathon with my BFF, Stu tries to offend a lot of various folks, and this is probably the only podcast that will have the sound effect of an MRI as a part of it.

And, oh yea, the Chicago Bears suck.

Thanks for listening!

That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!