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Is it Wrong to Think “Boogity, Boogity, Boogity!” before Saying “Amen”?

Last week a buddy of mine on Facebook was in a posting mood and for most of his musings he was finding a “shmoyoho” songified video (Gun control), or the “Ain’t Nobody Got Time For That” Sweet Brown classic to go with a thought. It was the “Smash, Smash, Smash” post, however, that spurred me to finally chime in and defend Justin Bieber, and also link to one of my favorite auto-tuned clips, namely Pastor Joe Nelms giving a prayer at a NASCAR race, where he so lovingly comments about his “smokin’ hot wife,” and liked to proclaim “Boogity, boogity, boogity! Amen!”

As it is quite a catchy tune, and having watched it again just before going to church, I couldn’t help but find myself humming it, whistling it, and all around annoying my wife with it on the way to mass. Then, as the service was going on, I was, in my head, trying to fit “Boogity, boogity, boogity!” into my thoughts prior to every time I said “Amen!” I thought to myself how much more enjoyable a mass would be should we change the proper response from a plain, ol’ “Amen,” to now including the “boogity,” but then I thought maybe I should head right to the confessional as, when I get to The Pearly Gates, there would be St. Peter, and I would either be met with him humming and smiling along, and welcoming me in, or cursing me for getting the song stuck in his head and pointing me in the other direction.

Alas, as mass was ending, and not really wanting to annoy our Pastor with the question, I simply decided to plight: Is it Wrong to Think “Boogity, boogity, boogity!” before saying “Amen”?

That’s it for this plight! I’m The dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Hatchet III

MPAA Rated – Unrated
It’s 1:21 Long
A Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

Hatchet III
Movie Stats & Links
Starring: Kane Hodder, Danielle Harris, Zach Galligan, Caroline Williams
MPAA Rated: Not rated.
Released By: Dark Sky Films
Blu-Ray Release Date: August 13, 2013
Kiddie Movie: Only if you want to turn them into a psycho killer, or a horror film director.
Date Movie: If she’s a fan of over-the-top gore.
Gratuitous Sex: Sadly, no.
Gratuitous Violence: Lots and lots.
Action: There is a little chasing, but not that much.
Laughs: In the over-the-top horror vein.
Memorable Scene: I don’t know why, but I loved the rocket launcher scene.
Memorable Quote: “And that’s the only reason those aren’t my balls hanging from that tree!”
Directed By: BJ McDonnell
Cool Things About the Blu-ray: The extras are actually well-done. Not too long, and pretty interesting to see how some of the things are done.

“And eventually the hatcheting starts and Victor Crowley stomps on a head.”

I scribbled that in my notes after I became a little worried watching “Hatchet III.” Fine, there was the opening scene with Victor Crowley and Marybeth, and sure, there was Marybeth, covered in blood at the police station, but for a brief moment I was worried that the folks making “Hatchet III” failed to read the title of their own movie. Low and behold, my worry ceased, any disappointment was gone, and Victor Crowley was back to his good ol’ self, hatcheting away, and we had a wonderfully bloody end to a trilogy of gory goodness.

I’d say the story for “Hatchet III” doesn’t really matter, but for this movie it sort of does as it’s not just a gore-fest, but actually does a nice job in giving the final answers as to why Victor Crowley can’t be killed by normal means, why he can be cut in half and still come back to massacre (And if you think I’m giving anything away, oh, please!), and what needs to be done to finally put him to rest. The story revolves around Marybeth (Danielle Harris), hell-bent on killing Victor (Kane Hodder), and how she seems to do the job, finds herself happily locked up on jail for doing so, and Sheriff Fowler (Zach Galligan – Yes, that Zach Galligan from “Gremlins”) and his boys investigating the bloodbath Marybeth told them about. Low and behold Amanda (Caroline Williams) enters the picture explaining to a deputy and Marybeth that Victor isn’t really dead, and when the screams start coming over the radio it’s off to the person holding the key to getting rid of Victor.

In the meantime, well, the SWAT team and the sheriff’s crew are stuck in the swamp with Victor, and of course things don’t go so well. We find that Victor has a thing for testicles, we find that it really isn’t that easy to aim a rocket launcher, and when our heroine finally shows back up, if she would have just listened to the crotchety lady she could have save a couple of lives, especially after a tender, touching moment towards the end of the film between Amanda and Victor.

The one thing really missing from “Hatchet III,” especially in the realm of the horror genre, was blatant nudity, and I was even watching the “uncut and unrated” version. The gore was top-notch, the story told enough without boring you too, and the people are generally stupid. Heck, I even really liked the “Hatchet III: Behind the Scenes,” and I rarely like extras on Blu-ray. But the lack of gratuitous sex and/or nudity, that hurt the movie for me, especially when, for the original “Hatchet,” on the extras, Adam Green, the writer for the “Hatchet” trilogy, says “If I’m not going to see some nudity and some gore, don’t waste my time.” I know Adam didn’t direct this one, but I’m sorry, Marybeth getting hosed down in the slammer didn’t cut it.

You will get most of what you would expect for a movie called “Hatchet III,” especially as a viewer of the previous two, but in terms of homage to the great films, the lack of boobs was bad, and I sadly have to drop my rating a star. I was heading to a 4 star review, but I’ve got to stick with some rating morals and drop “Hatchet III” to a 3 star out of 5 movie. The gratuitous violence just wasn’t enough to overcome the lack of gratuitous nudity.

The extras on the Blu-ray will probably be fun for the fans. Like I said, I did enjoy the “Hatchet III: Behind the Scenes,” and the “Raising Kane” feature was nice. Yes, you get some commentary stuff, too, for those so inclined.

I good gore-fest, but I’m still wondering if the nudity ended up on the cutting room floor.

That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Errors of the Human Body

MPAA Rated – Not Rated
It’s 1:42 Long
A Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

Errors of the Human Body
Movie Stats & Links
Starring: Michael Eklund, Karoline Herfurth, Tomas Lemarquis
MPAA Rated: Not rated.
Released By: IFC Films
DVD Release Date: August 13, 2013
Kiddie Movie: They’d be bored. Put them to bed.
Date Movie: If she likes an artsy thriller with some gruesomeness.
Gratuitous Sex: It’s got some sex.
Gratuitous Violence: Nah.
Action: Nah.
Laughs: Nah.
Memorable Scene: The dream sequence with the mice.
Memorable Quote: Nothing really.
Directed By: Eron Sheean
Cool Things About the DVD: A weird Q&A between a mouse and a deformed baby thing.

There was a scene towards the end of “Errors of the Human Body” where I simply blurted out, “Cool!”, and then the ending scene continued. I have to say I became a little let down as things wrapped up, hoping instead for total mayhem. Instead I got “shocking,” though not really shocking at all.

The movie gives us Geoff (Michael Eklund). He’s a bit distraught as he is recently divorced, but even more distraught over the loss of his son due to a horrible genetic mutation. With his distraughtness, Geoff makes his way to a German lab to work on a cure to the mutation that killed his son, and finds himself in a twisted world of scientists. There he begins working with Rebekka (Karoline Herfurth), a geneticist who was once Geoff’s intern, and becomes entangled in a boatload of crap when he, of course, hooks up with Rebekka, and also stumbles upon one of Jarek’s (Tomas Lemarquis) mice. You see, Jarek was involved with Rebekka, too, he might be stealing her research, or they all might be in cahoots in some twisted genetic mutation experiments to find a regenerative gene.

Here’s the thing, “Errors of the Human Body” plays out like an artsy thriller, with lots of camera work that pans across scenery, seeming deep conversation, and a story trying to mix up twists and turns, but unfortunately, for me, it lost things when it could have really taken a gruesome turn after Geoff, well, got a bump on his head is the best things I can say without giving too much away.

There were a few things that gave too much foreshadowing for me, but the premise of the story was interesting, and could have really taken a fabulous turn with some viral infections. I also find the dying sequence just a little too long as it didn’t really have the payoff I wanted. In any case it was kind of creepy, especially a dream sequence, and if you want a nice, little thriller, in an artsy kind of way, “Errors of the Human Body” might be a nice rental or DVD to pick up.

In the end it’s about a 3 star out of 5 movie. It had the potential for more creepiness, but I guess they were going for more of an artsy ending. So be it.

Not too much on the Special Features side for the DVD, just a creepy Q&A with a mouse and a deformed baby for the most part.

That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Does a Waffle Taco Sound Appetizing?

Okay, to be fair, it isn’t really a taco as you are thinking, that being a waffle, shaped like a taco shell, and filled with taco meat, lettuce, tomatoes, and some hot sauce. Nope, Taco Bell has been trying out this thing they are calling a “Waffle Taco” because they, too, are looking to get into the breakfast market. The sad thing is, to me, the thing actually sounds kind of tasty, in a gross kind of way, kind of like the McGriddle concept at McDonald’s.  It seems the “Taco Waffle” is a waffle, and yes, shaped like a taco shell, but filled with breakfast goodness like scrambled eggs, sausage, and a side of syrup. I guess it’s been a hit in Southern California, and Taco Bell is now expanding their test markets to fast food meccas like Nebraska and Tennessee. I’m going to guess it’s going to be a hit in those locals as well, which means, coming soon to a Taco Bell near you, breakfast food, including a Waffle Taco.

I guess my plight question is a little misleading because if you just read it, well, it might sound gross and not tasty, but in any case, I’m plighting: Does a Waffle Taco sound appetizing?

That’s it for this plight! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

On the Road

MPAA Rated – R
It’s 2:04 Long
A Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

On the Road
Movie Stats & Links
Starring: Sam Riley, Garrett Hedlund, Kristen Stewart, Kirsten Dunst, Amy Adams, Viggo Mortensen
MPAA Rated: R
Released By: IFC Films
Blu-ray Release Date: August 6, 2013
Kiddie Movie: There is sex, drugs, and jazz. Send them to bed.
Date Movie: If she likes sex, drugs, jazz, and a long, drawn-out tale of boys and a girl travelling across the country.
Gratuitous Sex: Quite a bit.
Gratuitous Violence: Ehh.
Action: Nah.
Laughs: Ehh.
Memorable Scene: Sadly even some of the more shocking scenes didn’t shock me.
Memorable Quote: Nah.
Directed By: Walter Salles

I wanted to like “On the Road” a lot more than I did, I think mostly because I think I was supposed to. I guess that’s not a great start for a review, at least if you are thinking of getting the movie, but there was a part of me just waiting for Sal’s travels to end.

“On the Road” is the film adaptation of the novel by Jack Kerouac by the same name. Having not read the book, whether or not the movie is a fair adaptation of the book I couldn’t tell you, but I do know that what seems like should be an interesting story of the travels of a young writer across the highways and byways of these United States turns into, at least for me, an uninteresting after uninteresting story of Sal the writer, played by Sam Riley, and Dean the ex-con, played by Garrett Hedlund, with Dean’s woman, Marylou (Kristen Stewart) along for the ride. Sure, they come across all kinds of characters in their journeys, and sure, all of them being kind of young they all seem to be searching for life’s meaning, but after a while I just wanted to tell them to stop and finally tell me exactly what is going on.

Sure, Kristen Stewart isn’t her normally brooding self that we know and love/hate from “The Twilight Saga” stuff, and she’s actually kind of a spitfire, but as the movie plods along from one escapade to another, I just got bored.

From the critical acclaim that the book has received over the years, I’m thinking that, in the end, it’s probably a story best left to the pages of a Kindle. The movie looked great, especially bringing a lot of the periodness as it was set in the late 50’s, and the scenery of the United States and the parlay into Mexico with a giant joint were beautifully shot, but as Jack/Sal was punching a line into his typewriter at the end, “I first met Dean…”, I was glad the story was over.

Maybe it was my mood at the time, but I doubt it, as usually I can be easily drawn into any story about people meeting fun people, and living on the edge, but not this time. The boys get in trouble, they boys smoke weed, the boys get laid, and the boys see the country. In the end the boys ended up kind of boring to me with a story that’s been told a hundred times before. It’s 2 stars out of 5 for “In The End.” I think I wanted more with the reputation I kept seeing about the book, and maybe that ruined it for me. Nah, I just didn’t like it.

That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Have You Ever “Vacuumed” a Couch?

Milo on his perch.

The other day I was doing some cleaning around the house! I’m such the dedicated house-husband sometimes! Okay, as I stop tooting my own horn, it wasn’t crazy stuff like dusting or cleaning the windows, just some basic bathroom cleaning, cleaning the fake, hardwood floors, and vacuuming. Like most men, I believe, cleaning around the house isn’t really my cup of tea, but sometimes it’s necessary to get done, and now that I’m married, it happens a little more regularly than it did before I will admit, and usually the floors ends up being my task, although this time I threw in the bathroom for good measure.

The vacuuming was progressing as normal, first the upstairs, then the stairs down to the first level, then the stairs down to the basement, a little in the basement, and then the area rug in the living room. As I’m finishing the area rug I notice some Milo hair on the couch. Milo has his favorite perch on the couch, it’s kind of his TV viewing spot, and also the spot from which he can survey all of his domain. So, at this point, I have a couple of options. Sure, I could just leave the hair on the couch, but that seemed even too lazy for me. Option 2 was to stop the vacuum cleaner, get the handheld vacuum with the attachments, unwrap the cord, vacuum the hair, wrap the cord back up, put the handheld vacuum away, and then continue vacuuming. But then there was option 3. I had a vacuum, albeit a little large, and I pray my wife doesn’t read this Daily Plight, or one of her relatives/friends tells her about this, but yes, I hoisted up the vacuum and proceeded to “vacuum” the couch with our upright vacuum. It seemed a little clunky, but I’ll tell you what, it got the job done, and I think it probably did a better job than the less-powerfull handheld!

As I finished “vacuuming” the couch, I figured this was probably a guy way of handling things, but in the end I just wondered, and so I plight: Have you ever “vacuumed” a couch?

That’s it for this plight! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Antiviral

MPAA Rated – Not Rated
It’s 1:48 Long
A Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

Antiviral
Movie Stats & Links
Starring: Caleb Landry Jones, Sarah Gagon, Malcolm McDowell
MPAA Rated: Not Rated
Released By: IFC Films
Video Release Date: August 6, 2013
Kiddie Movie:

It’s a weird, twisted movie with lots of needles, blood, sexiness, and all around creepiness. Put them to bed.
Date Movie: Only if she’s into needles, blood, sexiness, and all around creepiness.
Gratuitous Sex: Ehh.
Gratuitous Violence: Some fighting and stabbing with needles.
Action: Ehh.
Laughs: Nah.
Memorable Scene: The dude sporting the herpes of his favorite celebrity just creeped me out.
Memorable Quote: Nah.
Directed By: Brandon Cronenberg
Cool things about the Blu-ray: The features are pretty standard, but it is a nice look at Brandon Cronenberg, and if you are a film buff the Making of… is pretty decent.

What a whacked-out movie. The sad part, there are some, obsessed, fans who would probably actually do the things that happen in “Antiviral.”

Let’s get to it.

Let me start by saying this is not a film for everyone. Things that happen in this movie are mostly slow, deliberate, artsy, and sometimes just downright weird. The premise of the story is that as a society obsessed with celebrities, people can’t get enough, even to the point that companies are able to sell viruses a celebrity may have so that the obsessed fan can have the same herpes, the same illness, the same sore, as their favorite celeb. Syd (Caleb Landry Jones) works for one of these companies selling the virus injections to the public, and he has also figured out a way to smuggle a virus out of the company so he can sell it on the black-market. Low and behold he finds himself with the crème de la crème of a virus, a new sickness that hottie Hannah Geist (Sarah Gadon) has, he injects it to sell it, and when she dies he finds out everyone wants this virus, and they are now after him. Here’s the problem – if Syd doesn’t find a way to get rid of it, a way to cure it as it would be, he’s going to end up with the same fate as Hannah, if he doesn’t end up that way anyway from those trying to get it from him.

So, if Syd thought he was in some twisted, black-market world before, now he is in a world of black-market, corporate espionage, and just out-right creepiness.

Like I mentioned, I’ll bet if Justin Bieber or some other celebrity had herpes, there would be some fan out there who would be happy to “catch” if from him, even if by an injection to the lips with a needle instead of actually kissing The Bieb, and “Antiviral” takes obsession to that level. The movie is set against a white, sterile-looking backdrop, and the acting is as creepy as you would want, from Syd the employee, to Malcolm McDowell who is trying to get to the bottom of the Hannah virus. They all do their parts well, and as I recommended this movie, if you are looking for some high-action thriller, this isn’t the movie, but if you want some weirdness centered around obsessed celebrity fans, this is a twisted look at those fans, and the world that might be built to appease them, including a butcher shop of “celebrity meat.”  It’s 3 1/2 stars out of 5 for “Antiviral,” as long as you know the kind of movie you are in for.

As far as the Blu-ray, it’s got some extras, namely some looking at Brandon Cronenberg (Yes, the son of David Cronenberg, which should give you an idea of where the son gets his ideas from), some “Making of…” stuff that is pretty standard, and the normal “Deleted Scenes” that are better left deleted for the most part.

Enjoy creepiness.

That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

My Amityville Horror

MPAA Rated – Not Rated
It’s 1:29 Long
A Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

My Amityville Horror
Movie Stats & Links
Starring: Daniel Lutz, Laura Didio
MPAA Rated: Not Rated
Released By: IFC Films
Video Release Date: August 6, 2013
Kiddie Movie: It’s a little creepy and a documentary. Send them to bed unless you want them fascinated with the paranormal.
Date Movie: If she’s a documentary fan.
Gratuitous Sex: Nope.
Gratuitous Violence: Nope.
Action: Nope.
Laughs: Nope.
Memorable Scene: Nothing stood out.
Memorable Quote: Nah.
Directed By: Eric Walter

It’s been a long time since “The Amityville Horror” movie hit the scene, nearly 35 years as a matter of fact, and most people forget, or have never even realized that the story was based on the accounts of a real family, the Lutz’s, and that there are tons of websites on the internet dedicated to the paranormal activity that supposedly went on at the time. As most people forget the story is based on a real family, most people also forget that it also means there were kids involved, and for this documentary, “My Amityville Horror,” Director Eric Walter takes us directly to Daniel Lutz, one of the children in the house, who tells his tales of what went on.

The documentary is interesting in that it doesn’t try to prove anything, nor give a final answer as to what happened in the house, nor try to say if what Daniel says is true or not, but it does a good job of letting Daniel tell his recollection of the events leading up to, while in the house, and the life he had to live after the movie became a sensation. He tells of mostly just trying to get away from the story, how sometimes people would realize who he was and the implications involved with being a back-ended celebrity. Much of the movie brings Laura Didio along for the story, as she early on befriended the Lutz family, and Daniel seems to feel almost the most comfortable with her around, which helps the movie travel along.

Was there a haunting at Amityville? Did the Lutz parents just try to capitalize on being in a house where some horrendous murders took place? This documentary doesn’t answer that, but if you are a fan of the Amityville story, seeing Daniel Lutz relate things from his perspective, even if he wasn’t even a teenager at the time  that things happened, is an interesting look on the events, and how being in that situation can turn a person into the man Daniel Lutz is today.

I felt the documentary was well made, even the “Making of..” featurette wasn’t bad, so whether or not you really believe it, if you do want to just see a decent documentary about a man with a story to tell, “My Amityville Horror” is a 4 star documentary in my book. No, it’s not a horror tale, so don’t expect all kinds of scares, just expect a man and his story.

That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Do You Eat Cereal for Breakfast?

I waiver on my choice of food for breakfast. As a kid growing up my breakfast could range from about 10 Chips Ahoy! cookies and a tall glass of milk, to Pop-Tarts (Usually chocolate something or other), and then a cereal kick with my favorites being Frosted Flakes, Count Chocula, and the occasional Frosted Mini Wheat, or Cheerios with about a teaspoon of sugar. Growing older things got a little different as for the longest time I was in a “two eggs with a piece of wheat toast” phase, and then my wife convinced me I should go back to cereal, so Cheerios it was, only this time it’s plain, no sugar, that is unless it’s Halloween time in which case I’m back to Count Chocula. I guess I only bring this up because as I was grabbing for my box of cereal this morning, on the Cheerios’ box, it read “Carefully selected oats that can help LOWER CHOLESTEROL.” There was the part of me wondering how they actually carefully select the oats, and I’m always leery of their boasting the lowering cholesterol wondering if it is actually the carefully selected oats causing the lower cholesterol, or is it because when someone who has been having a crappy diet for the longest time, including, maybe, eggs and buttered toast for breakfast, and they start eating healthier, wouldn’t their cholesterol naturally go down? Was their study conducted on people who only changed what they ate for breakfast? Why do I really care since my cholesterol has always been fine?

I guess it doesn’t really matter too much, as long as I’m eating breakfast, but I do wonder, and so I plight: Do you eat cereal for breakfast?

That’s it for this plight! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Can You Tie a Decent Knot?

Once again my knot-tying skills have been put to the test, and once again I realize I’m pretty lousy at tying knots. I’m not talking about tying my shoes, I’m good at the bunny-ear thing. Nope, I’m talking about putting up a banner on some posts and needing to secure said banner to some pieces of rope to further secure to the posts. Putting up this banner time after time makes me happy that I don’t go camping because I’m pretty sure I’d have my tent blowing away with even the slightest gust of wind, or huff or puff from a bear. You would think that after having to do this a few times a year that I would take some online course (I think I get overwhelmed not knowing if I need a Klemheist Knot, a Monkey Fist, a nice Yosemite Bowline, or maybe just a Cow Hitch), or ask our staff member, The Mystery Dude, a decorated Platinum Platypus of the highest order, for a tutorial, but alas, the task creeps up on me, and there I am, looping the ropes into these big, blobs of knots, hoping that they hold long enough for the banner to do its bannering.

I must say that I get a little jealous watching those dudes on boats, manipulating the ropes into these fine-looking knots that never seem to come loose, and who knows, maybe in preparation for the next time I have to hang some banners, or go camping, I’ll do some practicing beforehand, but for now the big, blob o’ knots are holding, but that’s not stopping me from plighting: Can you tie a decent knot?

That’s it for this one! I”m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!