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Do You Count Your Money After Getting It From an ATM?

I vaguely remember the first time I used an ATM (I shall do my best not to call it an ATM machine during this plight, as then I am really calling it an Automated Teller Machine machine, which drives me crazy when people do that, but I digress). It was around 1985, and I was given my first ATM card by my parents so that they could put money in an account for me, and I could easily withdraw it while I was at college. The ATM has come a long way since those early machines, okay, now that I think about it, not really. I remember the machine I used, it was in the Commons building at Illinois Institute of Technology, and as you would do today you would put in your card, punch in your PIN (Which should never be called a PIN number, thereby calling it a Personal Identification Number number), and out would spew your cash. About the only difference between then and now was that to make a deposit you had to put your checks or money in an envelope, whereas now the newer ATM’s don’t need an envelope when you make a deposit.

Back then then geek in me always dreamed things would change with the ATM, like instead of needing a card and a PIN they would have retina scans to identify you, but alas, we are still tied down with that ATM card, however, the geek in me also generally trusted the machine to give me the right amount of moolah, and I also remember that I don’t think I even counted my money when I made a withdrawal. The reason I thought about this is that the other day I re-noticed my wife taking money out of an ATM and then counting it, and it occurred to me that it was something I never really did. I guess I always figured what would I do if the amount was wrong? Sure, the ATM’s have those cameras on them, so should I fan out the money if front of the camera while mouthing “Hey, you didn’t give me all of my money!”, and then call the bank hoping that they believed me that the machine screwed up? I suppose if there was an epic fail in the amount of money the machine dispensed I would try to do something about it, but seriously, if the machine shorted me a twenty-spot, would I really take the time to call the bank? Sadly, probably not.

So that leads me to today’s plight: Do you count your money after getting it from an ATM?

Will You Watch Any of the Republican Convention Coverage?

It’s finally here, the days we’ve been waiting for – Convention time! Fine. For most of us it’s not really the days we’ve been waiting for, but up first are the Republicans who will be spouting how their plan, even though they most likely won’t really detail a plan, will be the greatest thing for America, to be followed shortly by the Democrats who will be spouting how their plan, even though they most likely won’t really detail a plan, either, will be the greatest thing for America. There will be a lot of speeches, most during times when no one cares, and most by people no one really cares about nor will most people pay attention to because they will be during the day, but there has been some debate about the lack of coverage of Mrs. Romney’s speech until it was announced her speech was being moved so that the networks would carry it, and most still wonder if there will be an appearance by Donald Trump, especially now that Mitt opened up the birther debate with some off-handed remarks not “meant” to open up the birther debate again.

Most of the networks are limiting their convention coverage to their respective cable news outlets, dedicating a whopping one hour a night to the main networks coverage after most kids should be in bed (10PM on the east coast) either under the guise that Americans don’t care enough and would rather watch Howard Stern on “America’s Got Talent” or that you can find the rest of the coverage elsewhere, but mostly that decision is probably about ratings (and thereby money) and that wacky “fair time” rule about candidate coverage.

I still don’t know if I’ll watch any of the coverage, I mean, there is “America’s Got Talent” and “Big Brother” to worry about, and with it being at 9PM my time, I’ll be getting ready for bed myself, but as I think about it, I’ll probably do my duty, try to stay informed, and maybe hear what Mitt Romney has to say, and that leads me to my daily plight: Will you watch any of the Republican Convention Coverage?

That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Do you find the engagement of Avril Lavigne and Chad Kroeger an odd pairing?

In the entertainment world in the past couple of days there was no bigger story than the engagement of Avril Lavigne to Chad Kroeger. Fine, there were probably bigger stories, but for a couple of days on Google Trends Avril Lavigne was way up there in the trending race, and it turns out this was the reason why. As a fan of teen, girl pop music, I’ve always liked the musical stylings of Avril, and I’ll also admit that you can catch me singing along to a Nickelback song, but I must say that I find this a little bit of an odd pairing, although who am I to judge their being ten years apart in age, but I guess since they are both Canadian they have that going for them and hopefully a lifetime of wedded bliss.

That leads me to this daily plight: Do you find the engagement of Avril Lavigne and Chad Kroeger an odd pairing?

That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Does God Hate Politicians?

Hurricane Isaac is barreling down on the Gulf of Mexico as I type this, and since the Republican National Convention is in Tampa next week, instead of the focus being on the things that really matter to most of the rest of the nation, it’s mostly about how the hurricane will impact the Convention. So be it, but you knew it would only be a matter of time before someone “important” would state that with the hurricane set to disrupt the Convention, well, it was God showing his displeasure with the Republican Party. This time is was Congressman Danny Davis from my greatly mis-managed state of Illinois, and although he sort of says it in a joking matter (here’s a link where you can find the audio), you have to figure there is a part of him that believes it, and that there are many more God-fearing folks who believe the same thing. He states, “Well, it means that the gods are favoring Democrats. Not that we wish any kind of difficulty in terms of the weather. But you know you take the bitter with the sweet. And if you can get a little sweetness without manufacturing it, that’s pretty good.” The thing is that he said a day or so ago, and now it looks like the hurricane is heading to Mobile, Alabama and will skirt around Tampa, so does that mean God, or “the Gods” as he stated, had a change of heart?

On the Roe & Roeper show here in Chicago on WLS-AM, they were commenting on this, and also mentioned that the storm also has a chance to park on top of the Democratic Convention in Charlotte, North Carolina, so that instead of just the Republicans, well, God hates all politicians. I began to wonder if that might be true, in a joking way in my head, which leads me to my daily plight: Does God hate politicians?

That’s it for this plight! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Do You Regularly Use a Napkin?

I guess I’m sort of a Neanderthal sometimes as I’m not a napkin kind of guy. I mean I know how to use one, will properly place it in my lap when I go to a fancy restaurant, and if I’m eating something generally messy like ribs or chicken wings I’ll have one nearby, but I just rarely find the need for a napkin, and at times it seems to drive my wife crazy. I’m not sure when it started, and for the life of me I seem to recall that my family wasn’t much of napkin kind of family, either. The table would be nicely set with some CorningWare that had this pretty, green flower patter around the edges, and we had the appropriate silverware for the meal, but napkins were nowhere to be found next to the plate, there was just a napkin holder nearby in case there was some kind of loose food issue. Somehow, someway, I’m just generally a clean eater, or at least I just think so.

My wife does her best to make me more refined, but more often than not she’ll catch herself as she’s asking, “Do you need a napk….?”, stopping to realize I’ve already eaten the ice cream and a napkin would just be a waste of landfill space. Sometimes, however, I humor her and ask for one and grin. Which leads me to today’s plight: Do you regularly use a napkin when you eat?

That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Do You Think Nicki Minaj Would Make a Good Judge on American Idol?

I’m a fan of American Idol. There, I said it. And I’m also a fan of those Real Housewives’ shows, but that’s another topic for another plight, maybe. Okay, back to American Idol. Over the past few days there has been a lot of hubbub in Idol-land as stories are coming out that Nicki Minaj, she of “Super Bass” and “Starships” fame, and she whom those little girls, Sophia Grace and Rosie on “Ellen,” like to sing her songs (though they sing the cleaned up version, not with the lines like “Higher than a m&$#er f&#$er” from “Starships”), well, Nicki is rumored to be one of the people to replace Jennifer Lopez or Steven Tyler as a judge on Idol, and for that matter, supposedly Randy Jackson is history as well, so maybe she’s replacing him. In any case, the latest wrinkles seem to be that now Mariah Carey, who is actually confirmed to be a new judge, is upset because she wanted to be the only girl judge. And to confound things even more, the latest rumor is that Kanye West is in the running as a judge, but I’m not going to touch that with a ten-foot pole.

Back to Ms. Minaj. Sure, she’s opinionated, and I suppose she could tell contestants they suck, but for me all of the names they keep throwing about as judges just don’t thrill me. I know Mariah can act goofy at times, so she could bring back the nuttiness lost when Paula Abdul left, but Mariah also seems to come off as too whispery to make an impact, and for me I think the Nicki Minaj act will get old after about three episodes. There was something about that first batch of judges that worked, with Simon Cowell being the serious one, Paula being the batty one, and Randy calling everyone “Dog,” and it hasn’t been the same since the trio broke up, but I guess you have to start the retooling somewhere (I see the interim crew of Randy, Jennifer, and Steven as the “We really don’t know what to do yet” crew). I don’t think Nicki will make a good judge on American Idol. There, I’ve said it, but I’ve been wrong before, and I’ll be there for the season when it kicks off in 2013.

And that takes me to this daily plight: Do you think Nicki Minaj would make a good judge on American Idol?

That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Do You Know What Time You Were Born?

Here it is, my first daily plight. Okay. It’s not really my first daily plight, I used to do this feature years ago in the early days of Entertainment Ave!, but then it slowly slid into a “weekly plight,” and then into a “when I get around to it” plight, and then it was replaced by, oh, well, it just stopped, which begs the question, “Why is it back?” I’m not totally sure, especially since, if it goes as planned, it means coming up with 365 plights during the next year, but as I was able to come up with a word of the day for a year, to the sometimes confusion of my Facebook friends, I decided “What the hell? Give it a shot!”

The format is simple – I’ll post some kind of question every day and you can vote if you want to, read what inspired my plight if you want to, comment if you want to, or just ignore it, but I hope you come back for a new plight the next day because, well, it’s a daily plight! Simple enough, right?

Now as I’m still testing this thing, seeing if the plight form works correctly, and also if I like the formatting of it all, and rather than just blow things out of the box with something like “Will Tom Morello influence your vote for President?”, I thought I would keep the topic a little lighter until I’ve got things set, and what better way than with a plight based on one I posted back in April of 2000, when I was asked a simple question that I thought I knew the answer to – What time were you born? I thought I knew, figured it would be on my birth certificate, but much to my surprise the time wasn’t on it, just the date. As I pondered how to find out the answer, another question popped into my head – At what point during birth determines what time you are born?

Birth is a complicated enough thing, not that I’ve experienced it first-hand, other than my own which I don’t really remember, but I wondered when it is official in terms of what time you are born. Is it when the entire body is out, or maybe when the head comes out? And what about if you are a c-section baby, what time are you born then? I suppose the way I would determine it would be to say it is when your umbilical cord is cut, but what do I know, I’m not a doctor, and if I were a doctor, do I get to make up my own rule or is there some guideline in the doctor’s rulebook that says something like “When the baby pops out all of the way and isn’t touching mom anymore, or when you get the baby out of the womb by c-section, that is the time the baby is born.” Even if it is the umbilical cord thing, what’s to say that, in order to be the first baby born in the New Year, couldn’t the woman say something like “Hey Doc, can you wait thirty seconds to cut that cord – I want to be on the news!” Sure, I could search the internet, but what fun would that be, and that still won’t solve my underlying dilemma – I’m not sure what time I was born, other than between the hours of 4 and 5 in the morning, or so said my mom. And that’s what leads me to my re-inaugural daily plight: Do you know what time you were born?

That’s it for this plight! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Ted

MPAA Rated – R
It’s 1:46 Long
A Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

Ted Movie Stats & Links
Starring:	Mark Wahlberg, Mila Kunis, voice of Seth MacFarlane, Joel McHale
MPAA Rated:	R
Released By:	Universal Pictures
Release Date:	June 29, 2012
Kiddie Movie:	Only if you want them asking for a vulgar teddy bear for Christmas.
Date Movie:	It’s good for the adult boys and girls.
Gratuitous Sex:	Somehow Ted gets it on with the ladies, and there is a boob shot.
Gratuitous Violence:	Ted runs into some problems with a crazed fan.
Action:	Nah.
Laughs:	From start to finish!
Memorable Scene:	The fight scene with Ted and John.
Memorable Quote:	Too many to list.
Directed By:	Seth MacFarlane

I know, just the other day you were asking yourself, “Self, whatever happened to Sam Jones?” Actually, you were probably doing some work around the house and heard something about Sam Jones in the background and asked yourself, “Self, who in the hell is Sam Jones?” Well, for the uninformed, Sam Jones is Flash Gordon. Yes, that Flash Gordon from the 1980’s classic, well, “Flash Gordon,” and low and behold he has been resurrected in the funny-as-hell movie about a teddy bear, “Ted.”

Let’s get to the story…

John Bennett (Mark Wahlberg) was the kid growing up who didn’t have any friends. There wasn’t really anything wrong with him, he just wasn’t friends with anyone. For Christmas he is given a giant teddy bear, names him Ted, and wishes one night that Ted will be his best friend forever. Yup, John goes to sleep, wakes up, and there he is, a living, breathing, talking Ted (voiced by Seth MacFarlane). One would normally think you would hide a talking teddy bear from the outside world, but for this movie Ted becomes famous, even appearing on Johnny Carson, but like most young celebrities, after a while no one cares about Ted except for John.

The years go by, John gets a girlfriend, Lori (Mila Kunis), and Ted is his best friend all along, even still living with John as John and Lori’s relationship grows. The thing is, Ted really hasn’t had the best of role models growing up, preferring to get stoned and sleep with hookers, and John is kind of on the same path, except for the “sleeping with hookers” part, much to the dismay of Lori.

As Lori and John have been together for a few years, Lori is getting fidgety, getting that itch to get married, while fending off the advances of her boss, Rex (Joel McHale), and also wants John to grow up. She knows that for any of this to happen, Ted needs to move out, and, oh hell, why am I giving away the entire movie? Okay, one more things to give away first before summing it all up, pay attention to the creepy Donny (Giovanni Ribisi) and his son.

Here’s the thing… “Ted” the movie is very funny, in a truly adult humor kind of way. Ted is a vulgar teddy bear who likes getting laid and somehow gets promoted at the grocery store by saying horrible things about the boss’ wife, while John is stuck in a world where Sam Jones is his idol (see, I bring it all back to Sam Jones), and we find out that Flash Gordon is now a partier who likes cocaine, liquor, and floozies, and yet both John and Ted must grow up, just a little, to get to the next stages of their respective lives. The humor is what you might expect from a vulgar teddy bear, and it’s not just for the boys, the girls in the theater seemed to have a good time, too, but I will say this, many of the jokes might go over your head just a bit if you weren’t a child of the 80’s and 90’s, or don’t know who Tom Skerritt is.

I loved “Ted,” both the movie and the teddy bear. You would think the joke of a talking teddy bear would get old after a while, but the truth is, there is a personality to Ted that keeps things moving, and the bizarre side story with Donny and his son wraps things up nicely. Mark Wahlberg does his best as the likeable slacker, Mila Kunis is her adorable self, and Joel McHale is great as the creepy boss. It’s good for the men and women, but leave the kids at home with the sitter, unless you want your son or daughter to wish for a slightly different kind of teddy bear.

4 ½ stars out of 5! I laughed my ass off and always appreciate a movie that doesn’t totally dumb things down for some great doses of the funny!

That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Machine Gun Preacher

Below is an excerpt from The Dude on the Right’s full review of “Machine Gun Preacher.” Yup, there’s a lot of violence and badness happening in the Sudan, and Sam Childers is trying to do something about it…

…There isn’t a lot very pretty about this movie, only that no matter where they are, no matter the atrocities around them, sometimes the joy of children can bring light to the darkest days. It gives a brutal look, and I mean brutal, at the atrocities occurring in the Sudan, as well as intertwines a movie about a man, Sam, who is torn between his life in the safety of the United States with his wife and daughter or trying to help the innocents of a nation…

“The Avengers” is a Movie, “Angry Birds” is Real, “The Voice” is Ending, and Do You Really Have to Tease “Celebrity Apprentice?”

By: The Dude on the Right

Download and Listen

During this episode of our “Weekend Wrap-Up!” podcast, the crappy weather must be getting to Stu Gotz as he drops the S-bomb a few times and tries to spread a rumor about the Agent Phil character in “The Avengers,” but Stu didn’t live a real-life version of Angry Birds like I did so I don’t know what he has to be crabby about! We both saw “The Avengers,” and I work to dispel Stu’s rumor while we both seemed to have liked the movie, although Stu does say the Little Gotz’s got a little antsy during the film. “Avenger” talk did lead to the “Super Hero Augmented Reality” app and Stu’s almost getting pissed off enough with Android to jump to the iPhone dark side. I thought he would have hated it because it makes you go to Wal-Mart.

I’m worried “The Amazing Spider-Man” movie is going to suck, we are both looking forward to “Prometheus,” Stu wonders if any of “The Voice” contestants can have a real career, I’m hoping for an Arsenio v Aubrey “Celebrity Apprentice” finale, and Stu introduced me to the term “cracker-crust” pizza.

Thanks for listening!

That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!