Movies Archives - Entertainment Ave!

Frogman

Rated: Not Rated | Running Time: 80 Minutes
From: Rotting Press
Available on Digital Platforms: March 8, 2023
Also available on VHS

I must say that when I got the press release for “Frogman,” I wondered two things. One, is there really a city called Loveland, Ohio, and two, if so, who would set some fictitious legend about a creature in said city.

Turns out there is an actual Loveland, Ohio, and it also turns out the city has a legend about, well, you guessed it, a frogman.

Who knew?

I’m still not sure the town will like the apparent “newfound footage” of frogman, nor the direction the footage seems to take the legend, but hey, it’s about 90 minutes of taking the weirdness of a legend of a, well, frogman, to a bizarre, horror-filled level.

As the movie goes, young Dallas, at an impressionable young age of 12, captured some film footage of Frogman, a mythical creature who lived in the woods around Loveland, Ohio. This creature was about four feet tall, looked like a frog, and walked around on two legs.

No one really believed Dallas, but his entire life he has been haunted with this footage, and of his desire to find Frogman once and for all.

Fast forward 20 years and Dallas is, well, 32, his life is kind of crappy, so what to do? You grab that old video camera with a couple of friends and try to find Mr. Frogman.

And if you’re a fledgling filmmaker like Dallas, you decide to also make it into a full-blown documentary.

As you drag your videographer friend, as well as the girl you want to be your girlfriend but won’t tell her you want her to be your girlfriend, along, quickly you find that there may be more to the legend than you believe. What really tips you off? Why, when the local sheriff tells you to leave town of course.

If you’re Dallas, do you leave town? Heck no! You’ve got Frogman to find, into the woods you go to set up camp, but you and your friends are still pretty stupid because you don’t really have camping provisions nor enough cell batteries for your phones, but damn, your video camera battery seems to last forever!

Eventually you find the true story of Frogman, and it ain’t good. Yea, let’s just say that there might be little Frog-people walking around pretty soon, and you’re wrapped up in the mess.

And even with all the footage you have, no one still believes you.

Ahh, the life of trying to prove a weird legend.

The difficulty I had with Frogman was that it couldn’t seem to decide if it wanted to go for the completely absurd or the uber-suspense side of a movie. There was a Blair Witch Project feel with the entire “footage” aspect, but most of the time that footage just showed some really inept people. Frogman didn’t hit that creepy level to feel frightened, and there were too many horror movie clichés, like the “I’ll go find dry wood by myself” scene.

While the movie folks did take a crazy, actual legend and turn it even crazier, I guess I wanted a little more. I’m not sure if that more was going over-the-top, or more on the being scary, but the more never made it. For me Frogman gets 2 ½ stars out of 5. I just wanted more.

That’s it for this one! I’m Andy! L8R!!

Dawn Breaks Behind the Eyes

Rated: Not Rated, but It’s Got Gruesomeness!
Running Time: 76 Minutes
From: Dark Sky Films
Available on Digital Platforms: June 24, 2022

At first I was a little upset with myself. Why? How could I request a film to review where I would have to read during it? I mean, it turns out the movie is from Germany, and, well, they speak German in it, and the movie has English subtitles if you so desire. I guess I got sucked into the ton of accolades the press kit listed, and as the movie began, I was intrigued by the main characters of Margot and Dieter so reading it was!

The movie is Dawn Breaks Behind the Eyes, and while you may have to read a lot during the movie, it is mostly worth it.

Let’s get to reviewin’!

As the movie opens, we learn that Margot (Luisa Taraz) has inherited a castle. Cool! She is also married to, for no better word, an asshole. Oh, boo-hoo, quit your complaining Dieter (Frederik von Lüttichau), you had to know it would be a long drive to a castle in the middle of nowhere?

Take Back the Night

Rated: Not Rated | Running Time: 90 Minutes
From: Dark Sky Films
In Theaters and on Digital Platforms: March 4, 2021

Jane (Emma Fitzpatrick) is kind of messed up. She does drugs, drinks, is kind of mental, and got attacked by a monster.

The underlying problem?

When you do drugs, drink a lot, and are kind of mental, most no one believes you if you are attacked by a monster.

What do you do if you are Jane?

Well, as Jane is also a social media influencer type, she takes her story to the little screen.

That’s great and all, but the problem is there is still this monster, the adults in the room don’t seem to want to do anything about it, and said monster keeps attacking Jane.

So, Jane decides she must kill it.

Such is the basic premise of “Take Back the Night,”

Let’s dive in a little more.

Witching and Bitching

Rated: Not Rated | Running Time: 112 Minutes
From: IFC Midnight
Available on Digital Platforms and now released on Blu-ray, October 5, 2021
Get it via : Amazon

Women. Sometimes all men can do is bitch about them.

Men. Sometimes all women can do is eat them.

Welcome to “Witching and Bitching,” a fun, weird movie where a group of thieves might have been better off treating their women a little nicer.

Set in Spain (the film is in Spanish with English subtitles), our movie begins as we get introduced to some witches. As witches sometimes do they are making a weird kind of brew and discover their ills can be cured with some gold.

Enter our men.

Bliss

Rated: Not Rated | Running Time: 87 Minutes
From: Dark Sky Films
Available in Theaters and VOD: September 27, 2019
Get it via : Amazon | iTunes

Just the other day I was saying to myself, “Self, whatever happened to George Wendt? You know, Norm from Cheers?” Sure, I could have Googled him, but it turns out I didn’t have to as it turns out Mr. Wendt was part of the cast for the horror flick, “Bliss.” I was excited to see where he fit in. As the movie is a horror film, I wish I could say things ended up well for “Norm,” I mean “Pops.”

Anywho, “Bliss” gives us Dezzy (Dora Madison). She is your basic starving artist, late on her rent, dropped by her agent, and fears she may have lost her painting mojo. Yup, she has painter’s block, and she likes to say every variation of “fuck” a lot.

What to do? Why go out for some drug-fueled partying, of course?

What should you have? Why, Bliss, of course?

White Chamber

Rated: Not Rated | Running Time: 89 Minutes
From: Dark Sky Films
In Theaters and VOD: March 29, 2019
Get it via : iTunes

I get so mad at myself when I don’t see the plot twist coming. I also secretly applaud the film folks when they pull it off. And so I must applaud the film folks of “White Chamber” when the big reveal came towards the end of the movie because I just didn’t see it coming.

It was a wonderful “Ahhh!”

I won’t give this moment away, so let’s get to the story.

It appears the United Kingdom is in a civil war. Somehow the military has taken over, led by General Zakarian (Oded Fehr). Enter Ruth (Shauna Macdonald), or whatever the woman’s name is. She wakes up in this white room, a.k.a. chamber, completely lit up, and with a bump on her noggin.

Continue reading White Chamber

Level 16

Rated: Not Rated | Running Time: 94 Minutes
From: Dark Sky Films
Available in Theaters and VOD: March 1, 2019
Get it via : Amazon | iTunes

Strange things are afoot at the secret lab. Girls are locked away hoping for one thing, to be adopted by a nice family. That sounds nice and all, but as we watch the girls and their training, it appears something else might be going on. Hmm? I’m thinking the good Dr. Miro (Peter Outerbridge) and his assistant Miss Brixil (Sara Canning), may be up to no good. Uh oh!

Now, the press materials for “Level 16” have a number of references to the Hulu phenomenon, “The Handmaid’s Tale.” The problem for me? This means absolutely nothing. Most of my experience with said Tale is walking by the TV when my wife is watching it. Yes, it looks interesting enough, but I’ve got enough shows, I don’t need to get sucked into another one. Me, I’ll do my best to review the film without the comparisons.

Back to the girls in the “school.”

Continue reading Level 16

Pick of the Litter

Rated: Not Rated | Running Time: 81 Minutes
From: IFC Films
Available on DVD and Digital Platforms: December 4, 2018
Get it via : Amazon | iTunes

Sure, you might notice them, guide dogs for the blind. And sure, you might marvel at how well-trained they are. What is easy to forget, though, is that they start as puppies, cute puppies, with various personalities that will hopefully lead them to being great, guide dogs.

“Pick of the Litter” tells the story of five puppies, Patriot, Potomac, Primrose, Poppet, and Phil, and their respective journeys to determine if they have what it takes to be the most trusted companion for the blind. It is a story filled with joy, struggle, and touches of sadness, oddly, when the destiny of a few of the puppies ends up that they just get to be dogs.

The documentary takes you through the entire guide dog cycle. It begins with the puppies being born, through the process of foster families who start the initial training and development of the puppies, and into the advanced training the little ones must go through to eventually graduate to their new life as a guide dog. Through the process the dogs, and the foster families, are observed and assessed sometimes with surprising evaluations and heartbreaking realities for the foster families, but the folks at Guide Dogs for the Blind (guidedogs.com) have their goals, to develop the best companions for the blind and find those dogs who might be better as breeding dogs rather than guide dogs, so tough decisions must be made.

Continue reading Pick of the Litter

Victor Crowley

Rated: Not Rated | Running Time: 82 Minutes
From: Dark Sky Films
Available on DVD and Digital Platforms: February 6, 2018
Get it via : Amazon | iTunes

Poor Sue (Kelly Vrooman). She was having the most wonderful of nights, and possibly the best reactions to a wedding proposal, ever. Then Victor Crowley had to show up. I don’t believe severed limbs and spraying blood is what she had in mind when she dreamt of being proposed to as a little girl. I suppose at least is was memorable for her!

It was also a fantastic way to open the movie “Victor Crowley.”

So, yea, the movie starts with exactly what one would want from a slasher film. First you get the bloodbath from many, many years ago, and then you get a quick summary of the history of said slasher, in our case, Victor Crowley (Kane Hodder).

Continue reading Victor Crowley

Cyber-Seniors

MPAA Rated – Not Rate
It’s 1:15 Long
A Review by:
– Andy Labis

Cyber-Seniors Movie Stats & Links
Starring:	Shura Eadie, Ebert Hobbs, Henri Pelletier, Max Schellenberg
MPAA Rated:	Not Rated
Released By:	Virgil Films
Release Date:	January 27, 2015 – Online and VOD
Kiddie Movie:	Not too young. It’s a documentary and there’s a lot of talking.
Date Movie:	It’s cute enough for the two of you.
Gratuitous Sex:	Nothing that will make you blush.
Gratuitous Violence:	Nah.
Action:	Nah.
Laughs:	The seniors with no governor on some of the things they say.
Memorable Scene:	Shura cooking the grilled cheese with an iron.
Memorable Quote:	Annette says “I’m not eccentric.” and Henri the mentor just rolls his eyes.
Directed By:	Saffron Cassaday

As I was watching Cyber-Seniors I couldn’t help but think of three people, my Mom, my Mom-in-Law, and my Dad-in-Law, and although a little older than all of the mentors in the documentary, my experience with each my seniors was pretty much the same as the mentors had with theirs. My Mom was an early adopter to the Internet though she passed away before Facebook hit it big which would have helped her re-connect with many more people she lost touch with than she had found just through email and Google searches. My Mom-in-Law’s adoption, especially on her iPhone, quickly accelerated once she hit Facebook, even to the point she has now discovered Snapchat as “GrandmaEleanor” and loves posting her “stories” while keeping in touch with the Grandkids. My Dad-in-Law stays away from social media, but loves finding any news site he can discover. Teaching all of them various aspects of the internet and social media takes a lot of patience, but as the mentors show in the movie, the patience pays off the minute you see the smile of the elder discovering the wonders of Skype, Facebook, and finding out that the younger generation swears too much in their Facebook postings.

As the documentary goes, Macaulee and Kasha Cassady had a high school project back in the late 2000’s after they witnessed their grandparents discovery of the Internet, and they started a program to help other seniors get online. They ended up setting up a group, recruited friends to help teach the seniors, and their sister, Director Saffron Cassaday, started filming the sessions. The documentary keys in on a few of the seniors, their mentors, the elder’s challenges in understanding the concept of the Internet with the youngin’s challenges in finding ways to help point the elders in the right directions, and the excitement of discovery as the elders realize their is another world out there beyond the walls of the retirement home by becoming part of their families everyday lives again.

The training progress showing everything from just turning on a laptop, to using webcams and Skype, even to online dating, while the movie concludes with a contest amongst the seniors, namely to see who can be the biggest “YouTube” star amongst them. Their worlds open up again, and it’s a joy to see.

The beauty in training seniors is that they rarely have a governor any longer, and some of the best moments in the documentary are times when the seniors don’t hold back about people’s looks and their opinions on life, and while some are a little hesitant at first, worrying that if they unfriend someone on Facebook that said “unfriend” will come and attack them, eventually, once they see the benefits, they love it.

All in all it’s a nice documentary about the youngins helping the oldins learn how to get online. There is a little bit of a side story as Macaulee and her grandfather came down with cancer during filming which kind of took the story off the rails a bit, and things dragged a tad as we came to the YouTube contest, but the touching commentary by Ebert Hobbs on having a purpose in life long past your retirement is both poignant and a nice ending to the movie.

A fun look at the old folks learning about technology and it’s 3 1/2 stars out of 5 for “Cyber-Seniors.” If you’ve ever tried to help an elder learn about technology you can relate to the patience the mentors have, but mostly you can relate to the joy when the senior finally “gets it.”

On a side note, if you are interested more about the movie, want to be a mentor or cyber-senior, be sure to check out the the Cyber-Seniors website.

That’s it for this one! L8R!!