Hatchet A Movie/DVD Review	DVD Rated - Unrated It's 1:24 Long A Review by The Dude on the Right

The premise is pretty simple – A group of people take a haunted tour of the swamps outside of New Orleans. Sure, the tour is supposed to be hokey, but Ben (Joel David Moore) is bored with the naked breasts of Bourbon Street and somehow convinces his buddy, Marcus (Deon Richmond), to tag along. Along for the tour is an older couple, a creepy dude making a video with two dudettes more than willing to expose their breasts, and Marybeth (Tamara Feldman) who finds it cheaper to take the tour than to buy a boat so she can look for her missing kin-folk. But Marybeth also knows the true story of the haunted swamp, that of the disfigured man-creature, Victor Crowley (Kane Hodder), and when their swamp boat runs aground, she also pretty much knows their fate.

Sure enough, our bumbling group stumble upon what’s left of Victor’s shack and commit nearly every horror movie mistake including classic blunders like: They split up; They make noise when the killer is near; They injure the killer then run away rather than finish the job; They, well, I think you get the point. But it’s all well and good for "Hatchet" because from the start of the movie you don’t get the feeling those making the movie are trying to get overly creative, just trying to make a movie in the same vein of the old horror classics we know and love.

The first thirty minutes of set-up kind of drag, but once our "destined for death by maniacal means" group finds the swamp, "Hatchet" kicks into a fun-filled horror fest with tons of blood and gore (okay, the first thirty minutes did have the nudity, so I guess it wasn’t that bad). The acting is exactly what you want in a horror film like this, you get lots of quality nudity, and even though the movie is titled "Hatchet," Victor Crowley doesn’t use it that much to kill those in our tour group, his bare hands are just as head-splitting, and when it comes to originality in the gore department, the gas-powered belt sander is just a joy.

For folks like my sister "Hatchet" will probably scare the crap out of them, but for folks like my niece, "Hatchet" might just prove a fun time watching a movie. The blood and gore are over the top, there is a lot of blatant nudity, and Victor Crowley is a great horror dude. It’s 3 ½ stars out of 5 because it gives you exactly what you will probably expect from a movie called "Hatchet," and had the beginning of the movie been a little stronger, it would have easily hit 4 or 4 ½ stars.

As far as the special DVD features, I found it surprising that the Gag Reel portion wasn’t that funny, actually having more to do about gagging, and quite honestly, I don’t have time to watch the movie over again with the commentary track. However, I found the "Meeting Victor Crowley" and "Anatomy of a Kill" features fascinating, especially Kane Hodder’s methodology for introducing the monster to the actors, and the use of actual special effects rather than CGI was refreshing.

And lastly, as much as my summary table lists some favorite quotes from the movie, my favorite quote from the entire DVD is from Adam Green, the writer and director of "Hatchet," when talking about PG-13 horror movies. It is simply - "If I’m not going to see some nudity and some gore, don’t waste my time." My sentiments exactly. "Hatchet" didn’t waste my time.

That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!