Tag: Rachel Weisz

Enemy at the Gates

MPAA Rated – R
It’s 2:11 Long
A Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

Enemy at the Gates
Movie Stats & Links
Starring: Jude Law, Ed Harris, Joseph Fiennes, Rachel Weisz
MPAA Rated: R
Released By: Paramount Pictures
Release Date: 2001
Directed By: Jean-Jacques Annaud

My only hope is that this movie doesn’t try to get too artsy. The basics of the story is about two snipers, Jude Law and Ed Harris. One is confident the other is kinda scared. One is set on his job the other is falling in love. The trailers show a good drama, some lovey-dovey stuff, and some quality war stuff to there is a lot of potential, but, well, the movie is looking to cinematographic so I’ll probably go see it although still be a little hesitant.

That’s it for this preview! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Envy

MPAA Rated – PG-13
It’s 1:39 Long
A Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

Envy
Movie Stats & Links
Starring: Ben Stiller, Jack Black, Rachel Weisz, Amy Poehler, Christopher Walken
MPAA Rated: PG-13
Released By: Dreamworks SKG
Release Date: 2004
Kiddie Movie: Nope.
Date Movie: Nope.
Gratuitous Sex: Rachel gets horny in one scene.
Gratuitous Violence: A horse and Christopher Walken gets shot with an arrow.
Action: Nope.
Laughs: Few.
Memorable Scene: None.
Memorable Quote: None.
Directed By: Barry Levinson

You would think you could put Jack Black, Ben Stiller, Christopher Walken, and Rachel Weisz in any movie and there would be something enjoyable about it, wouldn’t you? Somehow “Envy” proves this wrong.

This review will be short because I finally hit a movie that I came really close to walking out on. My preview of the movie gave this synopsis: “The story has Ben Stiller as Tim and Jack Black as Nick. It seems they are best friends and co-workers. Nick comes up with some cockamamie invention called Vapoorizer, a spray that makes dog poop vanish. Tim had a chance to buy into it before it hit big, but he thought it stupid. Now Nick is rolling in dough and Tim just gets more envious of Nick. Add Christopher Walken and hilarity ensues.” The problem – hilarity didn’t ensue, in fact, hilarity was nowhere to be found. Alright, that’s really not true, I did laugh a couple of times, but you know, I don’t even remember at what.

I’m not going to waste your time with this movie any more than you should waste your time with this movie. It’s ½ star out of 5, and the only reason for the ½ star was because there was a scene where Rachel looked extremely hot. What a waste of talent.

That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Definitely, Maybe

MPAA Rated – PG-13
It’s 1:42 Long
A Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

Definitely, Maybe
Movie Stats & Links
Starring: Isla Fisher, Elizabeth Banks, Rachel Weisz, Ryan Reynolds, Abigail Breslin, Kevin Kline
MPAA Rated: PG-13
Released By: Universal Pictures
Release Date: 2008
Kiddie Movie: Nope, most of the story is about love and romance, so unless you want them saying “penis” a lot, get a sitter.
Date Movie: Umm, duh?
Gratuitous Sex: Some kissing and rolling around.
Gratuitous Violence: Nah.
Action: Nah.
Laughs: Quite a few.
Memorable Scene: I won’t ruin it, but it made me weepy.
Memorable Quote: Maya: “I can’t believe she rehearsed with Charlie!”
Directed By: Adam Brooks

I am such a puss. I’m sitting there watching “Definitely, Maybe,” and the touching scene is telegraphed and totally obvious, yet there I was, getting a little weepy. Part of the problem I have seeing movies is, for me, foreshadowing is usually second nature, and I try not to let it influence my review, but damn, it almost sucks worse when you know what’s coming, you’ve already prepared for it in your head with “Oh yea, he’s gonna” do this, the moment comes, and you get weepy anyway. Like I said, I’m such a puss. Ugh! I hereby turn in my guy-card.

Anywho, “Definitely, Maybe” shows us that kids can be both inquisitive and wise, and no one is more inquisitive and wise than ten-year-old Maya (Abigail Breslin), especially after she was just given her first sex education class. When Dad, Will (Ryan Reynolds), in the midst of a divorce, picks her up from school after said class, little does he know the questioning and scrutiny he is about to come under, and it all relates to Maya wanting to know which of Dad’s previous girlfriends is her mom (she did, remember, just find out how babies are made) so for an evening bedroom tale, Dad gets to explain to Maya his past loves, and maybe help Maya understand why things didn’t work out between him and her mom.

Starting back in 1992, fresh out of college, with his college sweetheart, Emily (Elizabeth Banks), Dad explains how back then he had aspirations, as a young Democrat, to become President of the United States, and what better way then to work on the campaign of a Governor from Arkansas named Bill Clinton. To do so, though, Will must go to New York City, eventually breaking up the two of them up (don’t worry, that’s not really a spoiler), but this allowed him to find two other women, namely Summer (Rachel Weisz) and April (Isla Fisher). As the years go on we learn of Dad’s escapades and friendships with all three, with Summer being a journalist who always had a thing for her elder thesis advisor, Hampton (a fantastic Kevin Kline), while April becomes Will’s perpetual friend, although there is always that tension of love when they are together.

So, as we flashback from Will’s stories about love to Maya’s interpretation of the women, Emily thinks she has figured out whether Summer, April, or Emily are her mother, and we get to find out, too, only the movie doesn’t end there because Maya, wanting Dad to be happy, knows she has a little more work to do.

What makes “Definitely, Maybe” work are multitudes of things. One was I thought Ryan Reynolds did a nice job at playing Dad, as well seeing his aspirations for the world rise and fall with the world of politics (it’s a great scene when he throws his noodles at the TV as Bill Clinton is awash in Monica-Gate) intertwined with his relationships. You can also see his trouble in finding true love, and how, being a dude, he fails to see love right in front of his eyes. Now, as much as Ryan was good, it is really the women who steal the show in this movie. Elizabeth Banks does a great job as Will’s college girlfriend, I don’t think anyone really wanted Summer to be Maya’s mom, especially towards the end, with Rachel Weisz playing that part well, and Isla Fisher is just adorable as April, the friend and never the girlfriend. But, of course, the scene-stealer was constantly Abigail Breslin who was both adorable and hilarious, and used just enough to not overdo her adorableness and hilariousness

Okay, dudes, if you don’t have a sensitive side and you get pulled kicking and screaming to this movie, you do have three good-looking ladies to ogle at while your honey is touched by the romance of it all, but if sometimes you have a soft side, I think this is a great movie for couples of any age. Part of me, though, is sad, because it looks like Ryan Reynolds is growing up which sadly means no “Van Wilder: He’s a Professor Now.”

It’s 4 ½ stars out of 5 for “Definitely, Maybe.” Fine, you can attribute some of that rating to my being a puss, but there are a lot of cute laughs in the movie brought out by everyone, and the addition of one of my favorite A3 songs (and it’s not even “Woke Up This Morning”) didn’t hurt, either.

That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

Constantine

MPAA Rated – R
It’s 2:01 Long
A Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

Constantine
Movie Stats & Links
Starring: Keanu Reeves, Rachel Weisz
MPAA Rated: R
Released By: Warner Bros.
Release Date: 2005
Kiddie Movie: I think it best you leave them at home.
Date Movie: Only if she’s a Keanu fan.
Gratuitous Sex: There should have been nudity had I written the script.
Gratuitous Violence: Yea, pretty much.
Action: There’s some chasing going on.
Laughs: Not really.
Memorable Scene: Hell looked kinda cool.
Memorable Quote: Nah.
Directed By: Francis Lawrence

I am truly and utterly disappointed in Keanu Reeves, or John Constantine (the character he plays), or whoever was responsible for this. Constantine is getting ready to drown Angela (Rachel Weisz) so she can reconnect with her ability to see demons and bad things. Angela takes off her shoes and asks Constantine if she has to take all of her clothes off. He looks at her, pauses for a moment, and then says……… “No.” I don’t care if you’re trying to get back in God’s good graces, if Rachel Weisz is in front of you and she asks you if she needs to take off all of her clothes, there is one, and only one answer, and that answer, even if she doesn’t really need to, is “YES!!!!” She did look fabulous all drenched in water, but enough about my being a prude, let’s get to the movie.

John Constantine is trying to get back on God’s good side. It seems he was blessed, or maybe it was more of a curse, but when he was born he had the ability to see demons who took up residence on the middle plane of life. Not being able to take the visions anymore, he attempted suicide, found himself in hell, got revived, and realized he was doomed to going back to hell upon his death because suicide, well, is a mortal sin. He figures maybe he can get back on the Big Man’s good side if he takes up the cause of exterminating the half-breed demons who are trying to do a little more evil than just hang out here on our life plane. What he doesn’t fully realize yet is there is this maniacal plot by Balthazar (Gavin Rossdale from the band Bush who shows he has some acting chops), Satan’s son who has his own grand plans for life on earth. Enter Angela. It seems her sister committed suicide, which has a Catholic Angela distraught because she knows her sister is now destined for an eternity in hell. She thinks something strange is afoot because even though she was able to eventually block out her ability to see demons and bad things coming, she knows her sister wasn’t able to, and maybe something sinister caused her to jump to her death.

So Angela eventually convinces Constantine to take her into his world (where the bathtub scene that could have been so much more comes in), and suddenly our two heroes find themselves deep in the middle of Balthazar’s plan.

Sadly the movie becomes entirely predictable, we can easily figure out how Constantine can get back on the side of God, and low and behold, well, you figure it out for yourself.

This is a movie that needed too much explaining, and for much of the movie we get just that. This is also a movie that had some potential, but pretty much lost it from the start as it shifted from how Constantine would exorcise demons to Balthazar’s plot. Yes, some of the scenes of hell were fantastic, and Keanu did a great job as the brooding, dying, destined for hell but really, really, really wanting to make it up to God even though the Angel Gabriel (Tilda Swinton) keeps telling him it’s pretty much hopeless, dude that I guess Constantine is supposed to be. Sadly it gets lost in a story that became totally predictable for me.

In the end I’m giving “Constantine” 1 ½ stars out of 5. It could easily have gained a star or two had John given the appropriate answer to Angela before he drowned her, but sadly, the movie is only rated R for violence and demonic images.

That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!

About a Boy

MPAA Rated – PG-13
It’s 1:42 Long
A Review by:
– The Dude on the Right

About a Boy
Movie Stats & Links
Starring: Hugh Grant, Nicholas Hoult, Toni Collette, Rachel Weisz, Victoria Smurfit
MPAA Rated: PG-13
Released By: Universal Pictures
Kiddie Movie: It’s really an adult story although rated PG-13. There’s some swearing too.
Date Movie: She’ll make you come along, but you might actually like it.
Gratuitous Sex: Nah.
Gratuitous Violence: Some adult themes, but only the kid gets picked on.
Action: Nah.
Laughs: Funny pokes at the life of a bachelor-man.
Memorable Scene: None totally stand out.
Memorable Quote: Too many to list.
Directed By: Paul Weitz & Chris Weitz
Produced By: Jane Rosenthal, Robert De Niro, Brad Epstein, Tim Bevan, Eric Fellner

Sometimes a movie that is, well, just enjoyable comes along. For me that movie is “About a Boy.”

In this one you get Hugh Grant playing Will, the consummate bachelor. He stays away from any long-term relationship but is always up for the short-term, sex but no commitment type of pairing. He doesn’t have to work because of royalties from his father’s goofy Christmas song, although he isn’t particularly fond of this fact, but his friends think it is time for Will to commit to someone.

Oddly enough, Will hooks up with a divorced woman, with child, and by pretending to actually like the kid, and the mom, she falls hook, line, and sinker. Then she realizes Will isn’t her marrying material and breaks up with Will. For Will this is heaven – he has now found a way to hook up with women, pretend to like their kids, sleep with mom, and mom will break up with him instead of the awkward Will having to break up with the woman. Thinking this is an easy thing, he goes to a support group of divorced moms with kids, pretending to be a divorced dad who can’t see his kid, and hooks up with Suzie (Victoria Smurfit), who brings along Marcus (Nicholas Hoult), the son of Fiona (Toni Collette), who has some depression problems.

But Marcus is looking for a father-figure, and with Will pretending to be one, Marcus hooks on to him, thinking that if he can get Will together with his mom, well, mom won’t cry anymore.

Alright, this is starting to get a little to complicated, and I don’t want to give anymore of the story away, so let’s just say Will opens himself up to actually having feelings for a woman, enough so that he wants to be with her and not just for sex.

What’s great about this movie is the transformation of Will, from the “using” women kind of bachelor to a dude who has the potential to be a good dad and actually be a husband – and Hugh Grant does a great job at showing this transformation. Also great in this movie is Nicholas Hoult as Marcus. He is the kid at school who gets picked on, mostly because he just loves his mom, and is looking for a role-model to teach him how to be accepted by the rest of his schoolmates. Mom doesn’t have a clue, Will does, and Will realizes he is the last hope for Marcus to be accepted in an environment filled with putting people down – high school.

“About a Boy” was advertised as almost a romantic comedy, but that doesn’t do this movie justice because it isn’t one. Sure, Will wants to hook up with Rachel (Rachel Weisz), and who wouldn’t? Marcus teaches Will as much as Will teaches Marcus, and it’s just a fun movie of a bachelor man infused into a relationship with a boy looking for something of a dad. I laughed, I didn’t really cry, but I left enjoying this movie as much more than a romantic comedy. It’s 4 stars out of 5 for “About a Boy.”

That’s it for this one! I’m The Dude on the Right!! L8R!!!